MY POEM REVIEWED BY RAJ KISHORE PATNAIK., HONOURABLE REVIEWER OF ODISHA.
HUMBLED AND HONOURED.
ON ITS WAY!
Looking at the world through your eyes
Everything looks pretty
Everything that passed seems to close to you
Like the pictures of yours stick to my heart
Like moon clings to the stars
Or ,you will never get rid of me
Me and my shadow
We are closer than hearts that stick in a soul
When your dreams fall apart
When each passing day
And life gets more exciting
And love is either in your heart
Or in its way.
Dr.Prasana Kumar Dalai@India.
Date.Friday,24 Nov 2023.
Dr. Prasana Kumar Dalai,
Congratulations on your recent poem, “On Its Way!” Your verses weave a tapestry of emotions, painting a vivid picture of the world through the lens of love and introspection. In this expansive poem, you invite readers to see the beauty in the ordinary, to perceive the world as a place of enchantment when viewed through the eyes of someone deeply cherished.
Your opening lines, “Looking at the world through your eyes, Everything looks pretty,” immediately draw readers into a realm where perception is colored by the magic of connection. The choice of “pretty” is simple yet profound, suggesting a transformative power in love, capable of turning the mundane into something extraordinary.
The imagery of memories clinging like pictures to the heart is both tender and poignant. It resonates with the universal experience of cherishing moments and holding onto them as if they were captured in a photograph. The comparison of this attachment to the moon clinging to the stars adds a celestial dimension, elevating the theme of love to something timeless and cosmic.
The line “Or, you will never get rid of me, Me and my shadow” introduces an intriguing duality. It speaks to the inseparability of two individuals, emphasizing a connection that transcends physical presence. The metaphor of the shadow, a constant companion, suggests a bond that withstands the test of time and challenges, a relationship that lingers even in the absence of direct light.
The phrase “closer than hearts that stick in a soul” is a poetic marvel. It encapsulates the profound intimacy between two souls, suggesting a connection that goes beyond mere proximity. The choice of words is exquisite, evoking a sense of unity that surpasses the physical and dives deep into the metaphysical.
As the poem progresses, you skillfully navigate through the complexities of life. The lines “When your dreams fall apart, When each passing day, And life gets more exciting” capture the ebb and flow of human experience. The acknowledgment of dreams unraveling adds a touch of realism, a recognition that life is not always a smooth journey. Yet, amidst the challenges, you introduce the idea that life becomes more exciting, hinting at the resilience of the human spirit and the potential for growth in adversity.
The culmination of the poem with the lines “And love is either in your heart, Or in its way” is a masterstroke. It encapsulates the essence of the entire piece, emphasizing the inevitability and power of love. The dual nature of love, as something already present in the heart or as an entity on its way, speaks to the continuous journey of discovery and rediscovery in relationships. It leaves the reader with a sense of anticipation, echoing the sentiment that love is a force constantly shaping and reshaping our lives.
In terms of style, your use of metaphors and similes adds a layer of richness to the poem. The comparisons to the moon, stars, and shadow create a sensory experience for the reader, allowing them to feel the emotions conveyed in the verses. The flow of the poem is seamless, with each stanza building upon the emotions of the previous one, creating a harmonious progression.
The poem’s universal themes of love, connection, and the evolving nature of relationships make it relatable to a wide audience. Your ability to capture the complexities of human emotions in a lyrical and accessible manner is commendable.
In conclusion, “On Its Way!” is a captivating exploration of love and life, showcasing your prowess as a poet. The depth of emotion, coupled with the elegant use of language and imagery, makes this poem a standout piece in the realm of English literature. Congratulations on creating a work that not only resonates with the heart but also lingers in the mind, inviting readers to reflect on the profound beauty found in the journey of love.
RAJ KISHOR PATTNAIK